“You see us as you want to see us, in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a leprechaun, a monster, a cap’n, a tiger, and a rabbit. Sincerely yours, the Breakfast Cereal Club.”

Posted by David at 5:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)
Filed under: Advertising | Art | Entertainment

Noah Kalina has famously taken a photo of himself every day for the last 8 years. The YouTube video of his first six years in sequence shows him growing right before our eyes.

Of course, Noah isn’t the only person who has done this, although he is probably the most famous example. But others have undertaken similar projects. All of them are fascinating.

Time-lapse portraits of a face may be the most obvious and compelling subject matter, but I think science and curiosity might benefit from time lapse portraits of other body parts, too. What if Noah had been taking a second picture all this time, of, say, his left hand? It would be interesting to see how his hand ages along with his face. There probably wouldn’t be much change now, but as he ages it would get more dramatic.

Less subtle and more interesting would be a couple who starts this project with a newborn baby, photographing its hand every day. We might not have as emotional a connection to a hand as we do a face, but wouldn’t it be cool to see a real person’s hand grow and change over a lifetime?

(I’m both entertained and disturbed by the thought of a day when this kid discovers that not all parents photograph their kid’s hands every day; and then the day he rebels as a teenager and refuses to let his parents photograph his hand anymore; but not until after he has a conversation where he tells his friends, “Sorry I can’t hang out longer, but I’ve gotta get home so my parents can take today’s hand picture.”)

Posted by David at 1:35 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)
Filed under: Art | Ideas | Science

Treadmills and other aerobic exercise machines are pretty sophisticated these days. The ones at my gym feature touch-sensitive computer screens that you can use to track your progress, watch TV, or even control your iPod.

But some people see the treadmill as a good place to get some reading done. I see them struggling to figure out how to place a book or magazine on the machine without it falling, and even with a Treadmill Book Holder, it can be awkward to turn the pages. Plus, you have to carry all that around with you when you’re done running but still want to work out. It looks like a pain.

So how about adding an eBook reader to the list of treadmill features? The touch-screen computer is already there, so it seems like a very simple feature to add. It can be preloaded with hundreds of public domain classics. Just tap the screen to turn the page. By issuing gym members a PIN number, the treadmills could keep track of what they’re reading and what page they left off on. It could even be an outlet for selling new books. And the gym could have deals with magazine and newspaper publishers to provide their content as well.

A full fledged web browser with all my RSS feeds would be too difficult to navigate while exercising, I think. But a simple eBook reader could be just right. They could call it the tREADmill.

Posted by David at 1:43 PM | Permalink | Comments (15)
Filed under: Ideas | Technology

[Update: I had originally made this image available on shirts, but concern was expressed over whether or not selling such merchandise violates Ford’s trademark, even though the image is clearly a parody. Until the issue is resolved, I am posting the image alone as art.]

As Ford, GM, and Chrysler head to Washington DC once again in hopes of convincing the government to give them a bailout, I’ve invoked the ever popular “FAIL” meme and came up with this image:

Posted by David at 12:17 PM | Permalink | Comments (29)
Filed under: Business | Politics

Part 36 in an ongoing series of 60 Second Films.

A recent photo shoot brought me to a plastic mold injection factory where plastic doohickeys are made. Always a fan of machinery, I was fascinated by the process. Here’s how the magic happens:

Tiny plastic beads fill the big metal funnel. They are melted down and injected into the molds. Then the robot arm removes the plastic doohickey and the process begins again. Here’s a detail shot of tiny plastic beads waiting to be turned into doohickeys:

Hundreds of molds sit on shelves, ready to churn out anything from perfume bottle tops to sunglass display holders:

Posted by David at 2:46 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)
Filed under: 60 Seconds | Technology

I know I’m becoming a High Def snob when I don’t even visit the standard definition stations anymore. But for some reason I was slumming it in basic cable today when I came across a channel I’d never really looked at before: Ovation TV.

Their slogan is “Make life creative.” For anyone with an interest in photography, architecture, design, music, etc, I encourage you to see what’s coming up and clear some room on your DVR.

Here’s an example of what they’re showing in just the next 48 hours:

• All six episodes of the BBC series “Genius of Photography”
• The documentary “Cindi Sherman: Nobody’s Here But Me”
• A profile of German photomontage artist John Heartfield
• Documentaries about architects I.M. Pei and Mies Van Der Rohe
• A concert by pianist Lang Lang
• A profile of Piet Mondrian
• An episode of their original series “Close Up: Photographers at Work.”

And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Then there’s the Ovation TV website, which features TV schedules you can view by either date or subject matter, as well as interactive features like “art or not?” plus community and video sections that I look forward to exploring.

I wish I had enough time to watch it all. I could dedicate an entire DVR to the programming on their station. You can use the widget on their site to find out what channel it’s on in your area. Now if they would just upgrade to High Def I’d be in creative heaven.

Posted by David at 9:12 PM | Permalink | Comments (11)
Filed under: Art | Entertainment

As George Bush prepares to move out of the White House at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue in Washington, DC, and Barack Obama prepares to move in, I thought I’d take a virtual trip around the country and see what’s going on at other locations with the same address.

The following photos come via Google Street View:

1600 Pennsylvania Ave in Baltimore, MD

1600 Pennsylvania Ave in Glendora, CA

1600 Pennsylvania Ave in Wilmington, DE

1600 Pennsylvania Ave in Bremerton, WA

1600 Pennsylvania Ave in Savannah, GA

1600 Pennsylvania Ave in Terre Haute, IN

Continue reading “At 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue” »

Posted by David at 11:18 PM | Permalink | Comments (16)
Filed under: Lists | Politics | Travel

I recently came across this story in my archives. It’s the first chapter of a whodunit parody I wrote ten years ago. Enjoy.

Murder in the Hundred Acre Wood

CHAPTER ONE.
In Which Owl Is Killed.

   It was a wintry Wednesday in the Hundred Acre Wood, and Roo was stuck indoors. He knew it was a Wednesday because he smelled banana bread baking in the kitchen. His mother only baked banana bread on Wednesdays. He knew it was wintry out because his mother made him wear a sweater. And a scarf. And mittens. His mother only made him wear mittens when it was wintry. And she would not let him go to Owl’s to play.
   “Please, mom,” pleaded Roo as he hopped into the kitchen.
   “Now, Roo,” Kanga said to her son, “it is far too cold outside to go bouncing over to Owl’s house.” She gracefully jumped about the room, doing motherly things. “You can go over to play tomorrow.”
   “But I’m bored,” Roo whined. “I wanna go over to Owl’s. You promised.” Roo bounced around the kitchen, knocked over a sack of flour with his tail, and hopped into his mother’s pouch.
   Kanga sighed. When she and Roo moved to the Hundred Acre Wood, she did not know what a hard time Roo would have finding playmates his own age. She was forced to move out of Oscar’s Fields so quickly that she had little time for planning and looking into such things. She picked up what belongings she could carry and moved with her son to the Hundred Acre Wood, a place where she could start over.
   Of course, being a single mother, and moving into a forest where she was the only woman around, word quickly spread about the new neighbor and her son. As she settled in and began making her new home cozy, her neighbors stopped by to meet Kanga and Roo, and deliver housewarming gifts and salutations.
   She got a jar of honey from the odd little Bear who lived just down the creek (rather, the jar looked like it once contained honey, but it was empty upon delivery). His stuttering roommate Piglet offered flowers to “b-b-b-b-brighten up” the new home. Noticing the way Piglet flung his pink scarf over his shoulder, and the tender way the Bear took his roommate’s hand as they walked away, Kanga wondered whether or not there were more to the roommates’ relationship than meets the eye.
   When the Rabbit down the road came to meet the newcomers, the only thing he brought with him was a lecherous stare and a warning: “If I catch your son playing in my garden, I won’t be held responsible for whatever happens next.”
   But when Tigger pounced into their home for the very first time, that’s when Kanga knew that her boy would have at least one playmate. The black and orange striped creature seemed to have springs in his tail. He bounced around happily, a bit too hyper for Kanga’s taste, but just right for her little boy. Roo, still learning to hop on his own, was eager to play with Tigger. The two quickly became friends, and hopped together nearly every day. Kanga noticed that in recent weeks Tigger seemed to be leaving the Hundred Acre Wood quite regularly, often for days at a time. As far as she knew, Tigger had no job or relatives to speak of, so where was he always going? She asked him once, but he didn’t want to talk about it.

Continue reading “Murder in the Hundred Acre Wood” »

Posted by David at 11:44 AM | Permalink | Comments (23)
Filed under: Entertainment | Long

I currently have 4 episodes of the TV show “Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles” on my DVR waiting to be watched, but I think I’m just going to delete them. I can’t imagine wasting 4 hours catching up on that show. It’s boring. Each episode is just like the last one.

Now there’s another Terminator movie in the works. I’ve seen the trailer. I can’t say I’m very excited about it.

Why does Skynet keep sending Terminators after Sarah Connor? Or even John Connor, for that matter? Why not go back a hundred years, or two hundred years, and kill her great grandparents? Now that would make an interesting show (or movie, or comic book, or novel).

Future John Connor would surely send a human into the past to stop the Terminator from killing his great great grandparents. So how does this person fight against a robot killer in an age when technology is so primitive, using his knowledge from the future? And how does the Terminator blend in? What materials does he use to repair himself when he’s been damaged? Over time, as he gets more and more damaged, does he go from glistening machine to steampunk hodgepodge of parts?

I think there’s a lot of potential for period Terminator stories. Maybe there’s an 18th Century Ireland Terminator trying to kill Johnny O’Connor before he comes to America. Or a Dark Ages Terminator who’s trying to kill Sarah the bar wench. Primordial Ooze Terminator could have a heck of a time figuring out which slime mold eventual produces offspring that evolves into the Connor line.

The possibilities are endless. So why are they limiting themselves to telling the same old story the same old way time after time?

Posted by David at 10:59 AM | Permalink | Comments (20)
Filed under: Entertainment | Ideas

This is a thoroughly unscientific poll, and I’m not sure how I will interpret the results exactly, but I suspect it will speak volumes about who my readers are. There is no question, but there are eleven possible answers.

[People reading via RSS may need to visit the site to see the poll]

Update: It’s too late to add any more options without messing up the results, but I want to mention that all your suggestions have been great. I wish I had thought to include the following: 451 (for the literary crowd), 1.4 2 2.8 4 (for the photographers), 4/4 (for the musicians out there), and #000000 (for the graphic designers). I hope you were all able to find a choice that suits you anyway.

Posted by David at 9:24 AM | Permalink | Comments (135)
Filed under: Entertainment

With less than a month until the election, the campaigns are bound to get pretty crazy. So I think we should take a minute to relax, inhale slowly, and bask in the glow of the CNN Election Center monitors in a quiet moment with no one else around.

Posted by David at 11:21 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)
Filed under: 60 Seconds | Politics

October 27 Update:This post has been rewritten to reflect the latest news.

I’m pleased to announce that t-shirts and posters based on the Luke Skywalker “HOPE” design I posted recently are once again available! They were inspired by Shepard Fairey’s famous Obama “HOPE” poster, so be sure to check out his site www.obeygiant.com.

Posters and T-shirts are available for purchase at Zazzle.com.

Click on the Poster or Shirt below for available sizes and apparel styles:

Also available: The Imperial Party T-shirts and Posters requested by many of you:

There’s still time to get yours before election day!

Posted by David at 11:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (24)
Filed under: Star Wars

Practice until it’s second nature.

Posted by David at 12:02 AM | Permalink | Comments (14)
Filed under: Politics

I started Ironic Sans as a place for me to write all the creative ideas I have that don’t relate to my career as a photographer. The topics I write about here run the gamut, but I primarily express myself through photography, and I figure that some of you might like the projects I’m working on. So I’ve decided that it’s about time I start a blog about my photography.

The new blog is called DFP:BLOG, and its launch coincides with the redesign of my photography portfolio site.

Currently on the blog, you can see some of the people I’ve photographed for my ongoing series of inventor portraits, like Tony Pagoto, seen below in his living room, who invented a gadget for keeping the wires under your desk tidy.

And, from my archives, I’ve posted a seldom seen photo essay I shot in a denim factory in Kentucky. If you’ve ever wondered who the people are who put the holes in pre-distressed jeans, this will answer the question.

I haven’t yet figured out what the frequency of posts will be at DFP:BLOG, but when I do, expect to see more work along these lines, as well as occasional one-offs, and links to other work that inspires me.

(And don’t worry — Ironic Sans isn’t going anywhere).

Posted by David at 10:33 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)
Filed under: General | Photography

On the left, the logo for the Congressional Budget Office, the federal agency that analyzes economic and budgetary decisions and provides projections on their effects on the national debt.

On the right, the logo for Omni Consumer Products, the megacorporation from the Robocop movies that seeks to make money privatizing government agencies.

The Congressional Budget Office is supposed to be nonpartisan, but I think I get a whiff of corporate interest.

Posted by David at 9:52 PM | Permalink | Comments (8)
Filed under: Design | Entertainment | Politics

Part 34 in an ongoing series of (approximately) 60 second films.

Posted by David at 3:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)
Filed under: 60 Seconds

Update: The Luke “Hope” Poster is now available for purchase with Lucasfilm’s blessing. Also available as a T-shirt.

A long time ago, in a political campaign far, far away, this poster was hanging in campaign offices across the galaxy…

…and these logos were on bumper stickers from Alderaan to Yavin:

Posted by David at 9:45 AM | Permalink | Comments (46)
Filed under: Advertising | Politics | Star Wars

If you know someone whose blog features a lot of light text on a dark background, you can forward this link to the visual offender. It’s a special page demonstrating just how much of an eye strain it can be. Maybe we can eradicate this practice one blogspot site at a time.

For now, I’ll be using this bookmarklet which automatically changes any website into black-on-white in your browser. Drag it to your bookmark toolbar to keep it handy. (found here)

Posted by David at 9:57 AM | Permalink | Comments (26)
Filed under: Design

As summer ends, so does the blockbuster season. It’s time to stop watching movies all day and start attending classes. But wait! What if there were a way to do both? I thought it would be interesting to see what lessons are taught in the movies, so I’ve rounded up 10 classroom lectures from a variety of films. See if you can remember what movie each lesson is from. Answers are at the end.

(Hint: One of them is actually a lesson from a field trip, not a classroom).

SUBJECT: MATH

1) “Parenthesis means multiply. Every time you see this, you multiply. A negative times a negative equals a positive. A negative times a negative equals a positive. Say it. A negative times a negative equals a positive. Say it!”

SUBJECT: SCIENCE

2) “The parts of a flower are so constructed that very, very often the wind will cause pollination. If not, then a bee or any other nectar-gathering creature can create the same situation. Yes, anything that gets the pollen to the pistil’s right on the list. I’ll try to make it crystal clear. A flower’s insatiable passion turns its life into a circus of debauchery! Now you see just how the stamen gets its lusty dust on to the stigma and why this frenzied chlorophyllous orgy starts each spring is no enigma. We call this quest for satisfaction a what, class?”

3) “Archeology is the search for fact. Not truth. If it’s truth you’re interested in, Doctor Tyree’s Philosophy class is right down the hall. So forget any ideas you’ve got about lost cities, exotic travel, and digging up the world. We do not follow maps to buried treasure and X never, ever, marks the spot. Seventy percent of all archaeology is done in the library. Research. Reading.”

Continue reading “10 Lessons From the Movies” »

Posted by David at 1:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)
Filed under: Entertainment | Lists

Last summer, I posted my Top 5 Remainder Ideas, a sample of the many ideas I’d jotted down as potential posts but decided weren’t worth fleshing out for one reason or another. Instead of letting them wallow in obscurity, I purged them in one post. Well, it’s time to do it again. Here are 5 more ideas that didn’t get fleshed out enough to stand on their own.

Remainder Idea #5: TypOs Cerael

There are a lot of “O”s cereal names out there: Cheerios, Toasty-Os, etc. I had this idea that there should be a Typos Cereal. It would be made of all the letters of the alphabet, like Alpha Bits cereal, but you wouldn’t spell anything correctly with it. I only got as far as this rough illustration before I remembered that “O”s cereals don’t use the whole alphabet. They only use the letter O. Then I considered a soup called “Type O” Soup. It’s tomato soup with alphabet noodles. But that’s just too many layers of wordplay.

Remainder Idea #4: “Dear Juno”

At the end of the movie Juno (spoiler alert), Juno gives her baby up for adoption. I found myself wondering what will happen, fourteen years later, when that little girl decides she wants to know more about her birth mother. Her mom will say, “I guess you’re old enough to know that shortly after you were born, some people made a movie about how you came to be with me. The movie is called Juno, which is your birth mother’s name.” So the kid watches the movie, and then goes through the proper channels to get Juno’s mailing address. She sits down and writes a letter to her birth mother where she says she has so many questions now that she’s seen the movie. Questions like, “If your hamburger phone worked so poorly, why didn’t you just get a normal phone?”

Remainder Idea #3: Unsuccessful Children’s Books

I once doodled a drawing of Clifford the Big Red Log. I figured that must be the most dull children’s book ever. Then I began imagining other unsuccessful children’s books like Charlie and the Chalk Factory, Reverend Horton Heat Hears The Who, and The Berenstein Bears (about a family of burly gay men).

Remainder Idea #2: An Armored Bear Rug

Did you see The Golden Compass? I don’t advocate killing animals to decorate your home, but I couldn’t help imagining that those Armored Bears would make great rugs. Throw a cushion on the big helmeted head and you’ve got a nice seat, too.

Remainder Idea #1: The other Six Degrees of Separation

We’ve all heard the theory that every person on this planet is separated by every other person by six degrees. But one day I realized that something else is separated by six degrees. Every minute on a clock face is separated from the previous and next minute by six degrees. I think there might be something interesting that an be done with that concept. I tried coming up with a clock design incorporating the idea, playing with the six on the bottom of the clock in the designs, but I wasn’t crazy about anything I came up with.

Bonus Remainder Idea: Blabacus, the Blogging Abacus

I have no idea what I was thinking when I wrote down “Blabacus, the Blogging Abacus.” I must have though it was a good enough idea to write it down, but now I just stare at it wondering what I could have possibly been thinking of. Blabacus the Blogging Abacus. Is that an Abacus that has a blog? Is that an Abacus that is used as a tool for blogging? I have no idea.

Posted by David at 3:12 PM | Permalink | Comments (20)
Filed under: Ideas